Many people have shared with me how they’re unhappy in their lives, but they have no idea how to make a lasting change. They are just stuck.
They’ve tried things in the past, but nothing seemed to be a permanent solution. They struggled to find the discipline, which led to self-judgment.
I could easily jump ahead of myself and talk about the importance of taking tiny steps, but I’ll save that for another blog.
Often people I talk with have a feeling that they need “more” in their lives, but they can’t grab hold of what “more” means to them.
The truth is your “more” is patiently waiting inside you to be discovered. When we’re so busy going from one thing to the next, our inner wisdom doesn’t stand a chance of being heard.
When I work with clients, we start by having them look into the different areas of their lives to see what area needs the most attention. Together we explore where they feel stuck.
Maybe they desire a better relationship with themselves, their friends, or partner. Working through their relationship with their body may be on their mind. Perhaps they have negative mental habits that get in the way.
Whatever calls their attention is the direction we go.
There’s never a desire that’s “too crazy.” This discovery is all about them.
Next up is asking what’s important about having their desire fulfilled. Will a more loving relationship with themselves lead to more self-compassion? Will feeding their body more nourishing foods encourage them to take care of their body in other ways?
Once clarity is in place when it comes to their desire, it’s time to anchor it in. An anchor is a reminder of how they want to feel at a future time. In this case, it could be a word that reminds them of their desire. The word could be placed on sticky notes in various locations, a periodic reminder on their smartphone, or anything else that works for them.
Once again, this isn’t about what works for me but what works best for them.
To take it one step further, I ask about what will happen in their life if things don’t change–if they remain stuck where they are. Possible answers could be continued low self-esteem, relationship issues, or health issues.
Once they see the repercussions of what can happen if they stay where they are, they are often motivated to do what it takes to make a change and move forward.
Seeing someone who is ready to make a change in their life is so exciting. We can not change others, it’s an inside job. But I am always honored to part of that journey.
How often (if ever) do you feel stuck in your life? We probably all have our moments. However, you may have a nagging feeling that won’t go away. Please reach out to me to talk about it.